First thing this morning, we wanted to get some pictures to have for her "life book." Experts recommend that for international adoptions especially, and probably for domestic ones as well, that you put together a book of pictures and mementos to help them remember and connect with their time before they were adopted. It helps in building their sense of identity and connecting with their roots, especially since, in most cases, they are not likely to ever see these places again.
Yanka showed us her room and her bed in the orphanage, and we made a few pictures of her in her room and with various members of the staff. The conditions were really very nice. There were three beds in a nice size room with a single wardrobe that the girls shared. The room was painted pink, just like her new room will be, and it was very clean and fresh. There were two additional bedrooms as well, a blue one for the boys and a yellow one for the younger girls. There is a very nice size living room area with a large "pit group" type set of sofa components, an entertainment center with tv and a collection of toys, and a table for meals and for doing school work. There is a kitchen for preparing meals and a large bathroom as well.
Next we went to see her kindergarten. We were able to take a few pictures there as well but only of the outside and the entryway. We could not take any pictures that included other children without their parents' consent, so we were not able to get pictures of the classroom since school was in session. We did get to see the whole facility and meet the director and teachers. The school consisted of a single very large and very well furnished classroom. It is actually in the same building as the orphanage, but has its entrance on the opposite side of the building. There were probably 12-15 students in the class and there were three teachers there at the time. I recognized a couple of the children as being from the orphanage, but most were just local children who came there for school. The teachers and the director were all very nice and were very excited that Yanka now has a mommy and daddy. Maggie explained to them that we would be coming back for Yanka in the summer, so they will be able to confirm in her mind that we are indeed coming back.
Our next stop was the town center to find a photo studio to take some passport photos of Yanka that will be used for her US visa. On the way, we stopped off and bought a special gift for the director of the orphanage. I will say more about her later, but she has been wonderful and we wanted to do something very nice for her in return.
After we got the photos taken, we retreated to the same cafe we had visited on Monday while they processed and printed the photos. We ended up staying there through lunch, and Yanka proceeded to really start twisting the knife in my heart. She has been a daddy's girl since Tuesday anyway, and had held my hand rather firmly all morning long. As we sat in the cafe, she was next to me in the booth as we drank juice, played with the iPhone, and eventually ate pizza for lunch. We started playfully teasing a little bit, something that has taken a few days to develop, and then she decided it was time to start cuddling and snuggling. Up until this morning, she would sit in my lap and at best let me put my arms around her loosely or pick her up only for the purpose of seeing out the window. This morning she wanted to cuddle and hug, and would pull my arms tightly around her so I would hug her. She even leaned back in my arms a couple of times and let me hold her like a baby for a few seconds while flashing a big smile. I melted. It was a wonderful time.
After lunch we rushed back to the orphanage so we could say goodbye to the director before she left at 1:00. Yanka handed out the gifts she and Carolyn had assembled yesterday to all of the staff, and we had a nice visit for a few minutes. I cannot think of enough good things to say about this orphanage and this director. The directors of the orphanages set the tone for the family visits, and according to Maggie they can sometimes be difficult and uncooperative. We were blessed with unprecedented freedom and support from this director and her staff. They wanted to do anything and everything they could to make this visit the best experience possible. The director was totally open handed about the visit and placed basically no restrictions on us at all. She and her staff were readily available to answer questions and provide as much information as possible. They work very hard to bring the few children they have along very quickly and make them adoptable. They took great delight in talking about which of their children were in an active adoption process and which countries they were going to. The children in their care were all very healthy and happy, and they became very affectionate toward us as they got used to seeing us through the week. Unfortunately, this particular orphanage is the rare exception rather than the rule and conditions most places are just not that good. For anyone reading this blog in preparation for a visit to Bulgaria, please don't set your expectations for your visit based on this particular example. Unless you are visiting this specific orphanage, you are very unlikely to experience a visit with this much freedom and opportunity for interaction. We feel so blessed that Yanka has had the opportunity to be in this orphanage and for the care, love, and nurturing she has received there. I am very sad to have to leave her for a while, but I am very happy to know how well she will be cared for and that she will be actively prepared for the experience of leaving with us when we return. I suspect it will be difficult for her to leave; she seems to like it there very much.
We brought Yanka back to the hotel this afternoon for our last visit. She and I took out the trash, then she spotted the play-doh and wanted to make things. She sat in my lap and thought up things for me to make. She tasked my very limited skills as a sculptor to the utmost, but her last request was for a ball. I handled that one pretty well. After we made it, we spent some time making up games to play with the ball on the coffee table. As we wrapped that up, I took a piece of paper and traced her feet and measured her arms to get an idea of clothing and shoe sizes. She then decided it was time for one of her favorite activities of the past few days, brushing Carolyn's hair. She has said several times that she wants hair like Carolyn's, and seems a little embarrassed that hers has to be kept so short.
After the salon treatment, we got to the critical element of the visit, explaining that after tonight we would not see her again for a long time, but that when we came back, we would be taking her home with us for good. Carolyn started out by giving her a very soft pink plush bunny rabbit, and she was very excited. She said in the car later that she was going to sleep with it. We then pulled out the photo album we made for her, and I explained, with Maggie translating, where we were going, when we were coming back, and how she would come to live with us after we came back. I walked her through the book and introduced her brothers and sisters, grandparents, cousins, cars, toys, and lots of other things. She loved it, and went through it herself several times, naming everyone and everything in it. She even showed it to the bunny rabbit. She has a very tender heart. When she saw the picture of Elizabeth she said, "Oh, she's so sweet!" She had said the same thing about a picture of Caroline a few days before. When we told her that she would be able to grow her hair out after she came to us, she pointed to her back just above her waist and said she wanted it that long. Her hair is thick and wavy, so it ought to be stunning grown out long. Finally, we introduced her to her new name. Actually, we let Maggie handle it and she did wonderfully. She told Yanka that where we live, people have names that sound more like ... and then she listed off the names of her brothers and sisters. She told her that she would have a name like that as well - Emily Catherine. When Maggie asked her if she liked it, she enthusiastically shook her head and said yes. The staff at the orphanage was told about the new name as well, and they will start using it to help her get used to it. So, from this point forward, she is now Emily Catherine Osborne. We're not absolutely sure at this point whether she will be Emily Cate or just Emily, but Emily is easier for a one-finger typist. On the way back to the orphanage, Emily and Maggie had a long conversation as she tried to work all of this new information out in her mind and understand what it all meant. She still doesn't fully grasp it yet, and may not until several days go by and we do not come, but the orphanage staff and her teachers will continue to reinforce that mommy and daddy will be back in the summer, and once the official court decree is issued, the staff at the orphanage will start priming her for the transition. I am confident they will do an excellent job.
Saying goodbye to Emily for the last time was tough, but she is in excellent hands and we will be working hard to get ready for her. God is working everything out perfectly.
Tomorrow we are off for a six hour drive to Shumen (possibly longer if the road are in bad shape) where we will enjoy a day off on Sunday and get ready to meet Severina on Monday.
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